A Different Valentine

Hello All !!!

💕 Wishing You A Very Happy Valentine's Day ..

This is that time of the year when those of you new in relationships feel themselves to be in cloud nine.. Those who haven't yet embarked on the roller-coaster ride wish you had that special person to care for you the rest of your lives . Watching couples cosying up in a corner .. fighting for a little personal space in the crowd .. men going down on their knees with red roses in their hands . . girls giggling relentlessly like they have just swallowed the magic potion for eternal happiness .. you too wished you had a steady boyfriend/ girlfriend. Many of you have gone through the trauma of proposing and being rejected .. some of you have been left in the lurch by your unfaithful partners and are still battling with yourselves to come to terms with the situation.

You've always been told to express your feelings to the person you love .. whether they’re your secret crush, your platonic best friend, or your long-term partner. Hiding feelings .. secretly loving someone are passe .. Holding on to unrequited love is an old and abandonable trait .. a disease to have died with the character of Devdas (the central character of Sharat Chandra Banerjee 's immortal classic novella: an archetypal lover in separation from his forbidden childhood love, who drinks himself to death) for good and in an age demanding self-reliance and financial independence, such characters are always looked down with contempt.

But today what I want to tell you is a bit different .. rather it is one hundred and eighty degrees opposite to the prevailing takes on the subject .. If you ask me I'll say not to express your feelings . Yes .. You heard it right. Why ? If you do either the other person may/ may not reciprocate your feelings. If you're openly rejected you might go home dejected .. it might take a toll on your emotional health, the least to say; or you might grow out of it and move along in life. However whether someone accepts/ rejects you outright, it doesn't necessarily have to be that you've been told the truth.

There are various reasons for lying in romantic relationships like in any other relationship. Human beings are complex in their thoughts and actions . Each person lives many lives in one .. one that their parents expect them to be .. another their office bosses want them to be .. while still another which they believe they should be living. Coordinating so many lives at the same time is difficult. Each person wants their ego to be satisfied in line with the prejudices they have about themselves or the ones their society imparts them since their childhood. When egos come into conflicts, relationships suffer. But true love has nothing to do with typical relationships, whose success depends on the skills used by people to satisfy the egos of their partners . This is because in true love a person sees one's partner to be a reflection of oneself rather than another one whom he/ she wants to possess .. hold on to and change according to his/ her wishes. Since human beings love themselves the most, above every thing else in the world; it is but natural for them to love their partners unconditionally .. when they're their true loves.

Now the billion dollar question is how to find our real valentines ? Though a person may never fully understand their partners even after staying together for their entire lives and there is certainly an element of luck involved in finding our other-half amongst the millions of people we come across in our lives; yet I believe in connection between hearts .. I know I sound old-fashioned and flowery but waiting in silence .. and listening to one's heartbeats being reverberated in every small action taken by the other is the only means of knowing whether he/ she has a soft corner for you. . If there is a genuine connection you'll definitely see the sparks no matter how smaller in size they might be.. believe me .. And if you don't ever find that person in your life or the person you love doesn't love you back .. don't regret .. don't despise yourself .. but keep the fire burning in your heart. Respect your feelings and keep nurturing them slowly .

Unlike the give and take relationships devised by the society true loves believes only in giving .. Today's young adults need to understand this .. True love is not something which can be played using mind game skills and won .. Even if one considers to have won remember love is a verb not an adjective. Its a continuous doing action. You have to keep caring .. being there for that person for your entire life .. The person will find out whether you're imitating your feelings when you start living under the same roof .. sooner or later.. So if you really love someone love without any expectations .. or never let that person know about your feelings for that reason. All this will sound bookish .. impractical and foolish but you've had a taste of intelligently matched relationships by the media (the various dating sites match you based on your food .. dresses .. music .. movies .. traveling preferences and choice of your relationships .. whether it is a one- night stand .. open relationship or friends with benefits you're looking for ; similar to job matchings based on qualifications and experience .. whether full time .. part time or contractual; or even the food you order online viz. starters .. tiffins or full course .. ) or by yourself lasting from few days .. months to maximum few years .. I hope you'll be honest to admit that the frequent break-ups and moving on to newer relationships had not been very pleasant on you and if you wished for more meaningful and long-lasting (if not ever-lasting) relationships then why not give this kind of love a try ?

With this kind of love there will be no tension of guessing your partner's mood rightly .. to live upto his/ her expectations .. please his/ her families unreasonably .. and despite all these live under continuous threat of losing him/ her. When you love your replica you love him/ her the best without having to worry about the future of your relationship because you know yourself the best . So till you find that person in your life be your own valentine.

Happy Romancing !

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